Saturday, August 10, 2013

How nice are you? or... are you trustworthy?..

piece that I did from Memories and Thanks Blog Hop
Saturday, afternoon now, a day of relaxing for me today. Ha, like that isn't what I've been doing since the end of May... My son and I are lounging around, him playing Minecraft and me looking around the pages on Facebook... ergh, hate facebook, but I look anyway.
I don't know how many of you are beaders, or how many of you 'know' Lori Anderson or follow her blog but I ran across her a year and a half or so ago... and signed up for the Memories and Thanks Blog Hop...I didn't make it the first year, but was happy when this year I got to participate. Then later I got to participate in the Bead Soup Blog Party, and I was paired with a lovely woman, Shannon Hicks from Falling Into the Sky blog  and we had so much in common. I figured that Lori must have known us both pretty well, but it turned out that she just "knew" who to pair us with. Lori is uncanny that way.... I enjoyed both of the experiences, even though I was in the middle of some turmoil both personal and family oriented and healthwise... But especially the Memories and Thanks was overall a very deep experience. I had to really think about myself, my family, my life... and I dug into the depths and came up with a blog and a piece of jewelry that I really was glad to have made. We just finished up the Bead Hoarders Blog Hop, and I had so much fun with that...
Shannons bag o goodies

Well... I guess that is where I am so confused now. Someone posted on the FB page, with Lori's permission about the person that the Memories and Thanks hop was for... seems that somehow, and I don't know all the details, this person that was supposedly dead, wasn't. Somehow this person that was supposed to have lost her mother, didn't...  Really, I didn't know all the details, and I don't need to... I guess from it you just take the lesson that you can't trust everyone... but... then Lori came back and was really upset with herself about it. Now... that hurts. She wasn't the one to blame. She was being wonderful, doing what she does best, organizing a bunch of people, to bring something wonderful about... and I feel really bad that it was her that was duped, and she is apologizing for it...
From BSBP

Somehow that is just wrong. She should never have to apologize for something that someone did to her. None of us hold her responsible. I for one am glad that I participated in the hop even if it was under false pretenses. It is the reason that I started this blog really... Oh, I had a blog before, but not on Blogger... and I didn't go into a lot of my work, and for crying out loud... Myspace did away with all the blogs anyway... what I am trying to say is, if I hadn't had the encouragement to start a blog so I could participate in that particular bloghop... I wouldn't be here, I wouldn't have participated in the BSBP and  I wouldn't have met Shannon, I wouldn't have been challenged... and I wouldn't have followed Lori on Facebook, and met so many other wonderful designers... so many of them are such great artists.

The knowing that someone has done wrong is hard to accept, and I have a hard time wrapping my head around why  someone would fake the death of a loved one... what is it that she stood to gain? I guess she gained some monetary  and products... but she has, in doing this wrong, lost so much more. She lost the friendship of not only Lori (who I don't know personally, but can say without hesitation to be a really nice person) and the potential friendship of so many more people... I don't know any of the people personally from her page, but I think overall they are all really nice people... I say I don't know them...  I may have 'met' some of them at one point or another, if they happened to attend BeadFest Texas... because that is the just about the only place that I get to go really... that I would meet jewelry makers... well, I do a lot of faires and festivals and meet some there... but... I don't remember people well, and if I don't have a name and picture to go with it, I don't remember people well... sorry if I have forgotten you... I don't mean to...

Anyway, I was looking through some of the comments today, and some of the women were pretty upset about the whole ordeal... I am upset that it hurt Lori, I am upset that it makes us all think twice about people that we 'meet' on the blog or FB or G+ or wherever... I guess we have to remember that we really don't "know" anyone... and that we can come upon someone that is bad... and never know it.
I have been warned a few times, about meeting men... sigh... When I changed my setting on myspace to widowed, then on to single... I got some weird guys sending me messages. I got one guy that was what I thought was nice He just wanted to be friends, and we wrote back and forth, never meeting.. but he ended up to be a cyberstalker, yikes he was pretty insistent and started texting me 20 times or more a day ... That was the end of that, and I told him I would involve the police if he didn't stop... so I don't ever give out my location, but really... how easy would it be to find me?

I realized with my business name that I could be googled...even though I don't have this business anymore... I don't change the name... mainly because I don't want people to "know" everything about me... I don't use my first name...but that is really easy to find... I go by my middle name, which I have always used... but I do vary the spelling of it... well... that isn't really anything other than I didn't want to be marie444 or something and a friend calls me Maire... I don't know why.... but it stuck... so I am Maire of Thistledown to most... but you don't know me... even if you google me, you will find very little about me. So how do you know if I am real? How do you know if I am me?

I guess you take me as I am... I take others as they are... Someone wrote that it's better to be fooled than to not trust. I guess that is right.

I just found out today that the person in the blog hop is from Tulsa... now, I lived in Tulsa when I was a kid, for a few years... that is where my father died... pretty quickly my mother moved us to Texas and that is where I live now with exception of the time I spent in England...I feel like that is a really sad thing, that maybe I know this person... but what would the odds be? I guess they would be really high to not know her... but there is that little odd that makes me sad. Tulsa is a pretty big town I was pretty sheltered while we lived there, but if she happened to attend pow wows or rodeos, or lived in Brookside or the West Side... I could have run into her... or maybe even, if she is old enough, gone to school with her... I guess that is really slim odds. There are a lot of schools there. I went to middle school and one year of high school before we left, but... there is that tiny chance... and it brings it home... you don't know people.

 Even if you do... you don't.

So far, my dealings on the internet have been very careful...I met a neighbor off myspace and we kept in touch for a while... and I met my friend Kev on the internet, kind of by accident, looking at festivals I ran upon his page and I can imagine that he thought i was stalking him!! Ha! but in the years that have followed, we have become great friends... even through some of the hardest times, he has been a great person, and I have learned to trust him... He and his family have taken me and my kids, and whole family in and treat us as their family. My son admires Kev and really enjoys the time we can spend together. I love his Dad and stepmom and his kids and enjoy the time we get to visit... But that is about the extent of close encounters from the internet...

 I haven't bought a lot on the internet. I have had really good dealings though. I bought something from a lady in England that has a FB page... and had it delivered to the cottage and it came out ok... I used paypal and everything was great. I bought a little purse from a lady in the States and had it sent to the house and it was  great, I payed with paypal...  I guess if you send items for a person, out of kindness... there is no way to guarantee that the person is true... that the person is representing themselves as what they are... How do you know?  I hate to think that we have to deal with everyone by checking up on them... I don't want to be checked up on... I have nothing to hide... but I want privacy... and no cyberstalkers like Bill was...

This is me... one of the only pictures I will post... and my son!

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